5 Responses to “Why do some people continually get into bad relationships with users, abusers, and addicts and others don’t?”

1. By Gene H on Mar 20, 2009 | Reply

   'Others' might be too aware of the social eye. Maybe the ones who seem to make bad decisions are going with their heart, unaffected by what 'good' people will think.
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2. By boogaboogabooga on Mar 20, 2009 | Reply

   perhaps some people hang out with a certain social set and others don't.
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3. By wireman1979 on Mar 20, 2009 | Reply

   There can be many reasons for this. Two that really stand out however are that the person feels that they can "save" the user, abuser, addict or whatever; and that the person who keeps entering these bad relationships doesn't believe that they deserve any better. Those are the two main reasons that this happens over and over and over again.

   I myself have never been one to think I can "save" another person…but due to several horrible and tragic experiences in my past I started making poor choices when it came to relationships and those poor choices became a very, very bad habit. I have now broken that habit and have learned new ways to react to and approach things that happen in my life; in particular with regards to relationships. I am a much happier person in general because of this…but in particular when it comes to my relationships.

   Thank goodness…I deserve to be happy and I want the rest of my life to be much happier and better than the first part of it was. I have taken steps to ensure this and my life is so much better because of this. And by extension so is everyone else who has any part of my life.
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4. By rose b on Mar 20, 2009 | Reply

   Some people are attracted or drawn to these kinds of people because of past tramatic experiences. Like if your mom dated abusers all the time then it is likely that her kids would be drawn to these people with out even realizing it. If you find yourself dating abusers etc then I would talk to a councilor and try dating someone that doesn't 'excite' you cause it's probably a bad guy.

   Hope this helps!
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5. By kissofatrophy on Mar 20, 2009 | Reply

   it's called co-dependency. Normally children of alcoholic or addict parents. They see one parent making excuses and enabling, and another parent always drunk or high etc.
   As they begin to form relations, they tend to gravitate to that sort of person attractive..the ones that will make them feel needed.
   Other factors unrelated are low self-esteem, an addict is going build this type of person up and and feel love, letting the addiction manipulate the person from money etc.
   the Victim complex as I like to call it where a person purposefully enters a bad situation just to have a reason to be pitied, paid attention to etc.
   The list goes on.
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